Taking personal time to improve mental health and reduce stress
This year's holiday travel will allow some breathing room for a devoted parent
December had only just begun when my wife, Judy, and I decided Santa should come early for our daughter, Rylae-Ann. Over the years, we’ve adapted holidays and events to make them more meaningful for our family, but this year we decided to try something new — and a bit challenging.
As full-time educators, Judy and I have limited flexibility with our schedules here in Thailand. The winter break in December was the perfect opportunity to visit family in America. This year, however, was different: Judy suggested that Rylae-Ann and I take the flight alone. It would mark the first significant time that Judy had been apart from Rylae-Ann since she was born.
Since Rylae-Ann’s diagnosis of aromatic l-amino acid decarboxylase (AADC) deficiency, a rare genetic disorder, Judy has been her unwavering caregiver. She was there for every emergency hospital admission, a hip surgery, and routine checkups. Judy was never more than an arm’s length away. Even during Rylae-Ann’s groundbreaking gene therapy in Taiwan, Judy coordinated every detail, ensuring she was present for the procedure and recovery while balancing trips back and forth from Singapore.
Post-gene therapy, Rylae-Ann has made remarkable progress, becoming far more independent. Yet despite her growing capabilities, Judy found it challenging to step away. Even leaving Rylae-Ann overnight with Judy’s mom felt like too much. Judy periodically checked in during our rare date nights, requesting photos and updates.
This year, however, we recognized the importance of change — for all of us.
The value of personal time
Rylae-Ann cuddles with her mom after dinner while her dad captures the moment. (Photo by Richard E. Poulin III)
Judy’s dedication to motherhood is extraordinary and inspiring. But even the most devoted parents need time to recharge. Constant caregiving, especially for a child with special needs, can take a toll on mental health and overall well-being. A couple of weeks apart would give Judy much-needed time to focus on herself while allowing Rylae-Ann and me to strengthen our bond in new ways.
Judy has also been working on a secret project for months — a personal endeavor she plans to reveal in the new year. Having hobbies and creative outlets is essential for relieving stress, maintaining a sense of individuality, and improving mental health. This separation would give Judy the space to nurture her project while gaining some breathing room.
With Rylae-Ann’s final day of school fast approaching, we decided to open presents early, embracing another way to make holidays more personal and significant. More importantly, it allowed us to prepare emotionally and mentally for the coming year.
This decision wasn’t just about adapting our holiday traditions; it was about prioritizing our family’s well-being. By making space for personal growth and time apart, we’re setting ourselves up for an even more incredible 2025.
Note: AADC News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of AADC News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to aromatic l-amino acid decarboxylase deficiency.
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