Closing the developmental gap: How we’re helping our daughter succeed
Students who experience success are more likely to remain engaged in learning
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One of the greatest lessons my wife, Judy, and I have learned through raising our daughter, Rylae-Ann, is that there is a big difference between helping a child succeed and teaching a child to be helpless.
Our daughter was born with aromatic l-amino acid decarboxylase (AADC) deficiency, a rare genetic disorder that affects the body’s ability to produce important neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin. Before she received gene therapy at 18 months old, many everyday tasks that most families take for granted were incredibly difficult for her. Sitting, standing, speaking, eating, and even sleeping presented challenges.
Gene therapy changed the trajectory of her life. The treatment gave her the opportunity to develop skills that previously seemed out of reach. However, it wasn’t the finish line — it was the starting line.
For years afterward, Judy and I worked tirelessly to help her close the developmental gap. There were countless therapy sessions, educational activities, reading time, and learning opportunities. We celebrated every milestone, no matter how small.
One challenge we faced was education.
Educational success
When Rylae-Ann attended a traditional classroom, she often struggled to keep up with her classmates. The problem wasn’t a lack of intelligence or effort. She was constantly being compared to students who hadn’t experienced years of developmental delays.
Imagine showing up to a basketball game where everyone else has been practicing for years while you are still learning how to dribble. It’s difficult to feel successful in that environment.
Research consistently shows that students develop stronger motivation and confidence when they experience competence and mastery. Educational psychologist Albert Bandura referred to this as self-efficacy, the belief that you can succeed through your own efforts. Students who experience success are more likely to take risks, persevere through challenges, and remain engaged in learning.
But the opposite is also true. When students repeatedly experience failure, they can develop what psychologist Martin Seligman described as learned helplessness. Eventually, they stop trying because they begin to believe that their efforts don’t matter. As parents and educators, that should concern us.
Over the past year, Judy has homeschooled Rylae-Ann and focused on systematically closing academic gaps. Instead of constantly reminding her what she could not do, Judy created opportunities for success. They built knowledge, confidence, and independence, one step at a time.
The results have been remarkable. Today, Rylae-Ann reads above her grade level. She can discuss books, ask thoughtful questions, and connect ideas across subjects. Most importantly, she now sees herself as a learner.
This became especially clear during her first week of summer school.
Summer success
Rylae-Ann confidently writes about space with her classmates. (Courtesy of Richard E. Poulin III)
The theme for the week was space exploration. Now, if there is one thing Rylae-Ann loves almost as much as ice cream, it is space.
Over the past year, she completed an entire homeschool unit on the solar system. She built models, researched planets, created presentations, and filled our home with enough space facts to qualify as a junior NASA tour guide.
As soon as the summer school teacher introduced the topic, Rylae-Ann’s hand shot into the air. Suddenly, she was not the student trying to catch up. She was the student sharing knowledge.
She eagerly contributed to class discussions. She felt motivated to write. She enthusiastically completed projects. She came home excited to tell us what she had learned and what she had shared with classmates.
Watching this unfold was a powerful reminder that children thrive when they are given opportunities to feel capable.
This doesn’t mean lowering expectations. It means creating environments where students can access success and build upon it. Confidence isn’t something we can hand to children. It’s something they earn through meaningful achievement.
Whether we are parents, teachers, therapists, or caregivers, our goal shouldn’t be to make things easier. It should be to create conditions where children can discover their own abilities. Because success has a funny way of multiplying.
When children experience success, they become willing to try. When they try, they learn. When they learn, they grow. And when they grow, they often surprise us in ways we never imagined.
Trust me. I live with a future astronaut who reminds me of that every single day.
Note: AADC News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of AADC News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to aromatic l-amino acid decarboxylase deficiency.
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